4 posts tagged “life”

For the first time in a long time, I wasn't really looking forward to Halloween this year. I wasn't going to be at Roosevelt so I couldn't dress up as a Simpson (ok, only 3 of my friends did, but still), and I wasn't going to host the annual Halloween parade. I was going to be sitting at the office finishing up the user manuals for our software program instead. Hooray!

After working almost 80 hours this week and last, I needed a work free weekend:Here's a rough timeline of the events that transpired.

(FRI) 9pm- My friends and I all went to Jesus' annual Halloween party. I  dressed as a good GI Joe (wore camo shorts, halter top, boots and guns) since Nancy was the bad Cobra Baroness, As soon as we parked, I called out to a guy in the parking lot who was wearing fatigues too. He had come with Sal (of the infamous Sal, Nancy, Tony, Emma double date fiasco) and was of course, Tony's friend as well. I was being friendly which came off flirty to the audience (my friends), and he started off flirty too, then somehow the subject of Tony came up. When he asked about that situation, I said, "We dated for a little bit. He broke up with me because he didn't have time for me. I didn't want to be friends with him so I haven't heard from him for 2 months." As soon as the words left my mouth, I realized that it made me sound like an immature, self centered, lame girl. And there I was flirting with his friend? The guilt started to build...

11pm-We left the bar due to a disagreement between Jesus and his brothers and the bar management. We left Sal and Tony's friend at the bar since Nancy didn't want them to follow us and at that point, neither did I. The party continued at one of the brothers' condos. Old school house party shenanigans ensued. I had a lot of pent up energy so as soon as the music started, Party Girl Emma came out of retirement for a few hours and Nancy (who didn't know me then) was surprised but damn, it felt good to really get down and dance again.

(SAT) 1:30 am-We leave the party exhausted and I'm still on my happy dance high so I hug the host Jesus and although we are all about 99% sure he's gay, he still tries to make out with me as we say goodbye. I dodged and slid away safely. 

7:00 am-Nancy has to go to TJ with her mom for a family crisis thing. I had spent the night to help her out but didn't realize this was the time her children started their Saturday morning since they had catechism at 8am.

11:00am-Talking to his friend made me think of Tony and I'd been thinking of him more and more often lately so I text him. His phone had died sometime between last time I talked to him and now so he didn't have my number. I can tell even through text that he is wary of the situation, but so am I. Strangeness ensues. 

5:00pm- A car pulling out from the sidewalk slams into the side of my car. Completely her fault, but yet another thing I have to do for my poor Echo. Sigh.

7:00pm-Twelve hours of babysitting and about 40 texts back and forth between me and Tony later, I think I'm ready to be friends with him. There's definitely still an undercurrent of flirting, but I'm not sure where this goes from here. He invites me and Nancy to a party he and Sal were going to later. Nancy vetoes it for both of our sakes and I concur. We go trick or treating around Lynwood where I get to see my old kids and feel like a celebrity. Nancy's neighbor who she's had a crush on for months is dressed as Jesus and as he's giving her kids candy, invites us to a party he's having at his house. When the kids hit their trick or treat limit, we walk back to her house and he reminds me the party's starts at 9pm.

9:00pm-We go to our friends' movie premiere instead of Sal and Tony's party or the neighbor crush's party. The movie is a short slasher film that's not so great, but our friends were in it so it was fun to see them onscreen even though they were the first ones killed off.

11:00pm-After eating a quick McDonalds snack, we are debating the pros and cons of the neighbor party. Way too many cons so I head home instead. I think of meeting up with Tony and Sal since Nancy didn't want to, but make myself go home instead. Never a good idea to go alone to a situation like that. I'm not ready for face to face yet anyway.

Sunday holds a Dia de Los Muertos Brunch with friends, a soccer game with my coworkers and hopefully some football while prepping for Monday.

Thank God it's Fall Back time, I definitely need that extra hour this weekend!  

No, I don't mean the scandalous usher kind. In fact, it's almost the exact opposite of that. Lately, I've been feeling lonely. This doesn't happen too often since I'm usually surrounded by people and have ten million things going on. I don't realize that I'm alone or that anything is wrong with this until it becomes the topic of discussion and with another wedding on the horizon, it's that time again.

Couples vs. Singles at a wedding. None of my coupled friends are mean or ill willed, in fact they are some of the sweetest people I've met, it's just that they've been coupled so long they cannot relate to the single girl life or are at the point where they can't even empathize. This week I have heard "Oh, Nancy's your date at the wedding? I remember when I had to share my invite with the other single girl." or "Poor single girls table, no guy is gonna approach that and ask anyone to dance." or "Isn't it gonna be weird to be with all the single people instead of at the fun couples table with us?" Ouch is my inner response, I couldn't come up with one to actually say out loud. I think I just looked at them in wonder, thinking, don't you usually know better than this?

I don't know what it is but I'm really dreading this wedding for some reason. It seems like lately all my single friends are manhunting and I hate that. It's one thing when the three of us decide to do it as a unified effort to be more social or open minded or whatever. It's another when not only is everyone around me looking to hook up, but that desire turns into changing what could have been a fun, special event into a meat market. Out of the 26 people that my friend invited from school, 4 of us are single girls. Like I mentioned in the last post, Nancy asked specifically to sit with me at a table with single guys. Porfi seemed a little jealous of this but she doesn't like Nancy anyway and everyone thinks Monique is a lesbian so that's a whole nother story. So I'm torn, the comfort of the crazy couples table or the potential of being at a singles table? 

I will admit that it would be nice to meet someone new to talk to or dance with or whatever. But can I do this and have fun with all my other (coupled) friends at the same time? I remember when picking up guys and flirting was a sport to me. Once Michael dared me to see how many guys' numbers I could get at a bar in a certain amount of time and I ended up with two in five minutes. Denise and I were counting the number of guys we could dance with at a club once and I got up to 11 since there were some repeats. I can't even imagine that Emma anymore.

But maybe it wouldn't be a bad idea to bring her out of retirement for a bit just to see what would happen...

When we were obsessed with Mike Tyson's punch out, we thought tko just meant triple knock out. But it really means that the ref just decided that the fighter can't continue the match for whatever reason and declares the other guy the winner. Sometimes it does mean that the fighter's been knocked down three times in one round.

If 2009 were a fight (and, damn, it sure has been!) then I'd be ready for my tko right about now. Just got back from DC (bus made me late for first flight, had to spend my last 50 bucks on the flight change, almost lost my wallet and boarding pass at the airport in Atlanta) to see that my car has a parking ticket, my phone screen is dead again and my dad is in the hospital. Fucking threes.

I was supposed to go to a funeral today (thu) for a friend's mother who died last week but of course I rushed down to SD instead. He was in the same hospital as my grandpa, and in the same room where my grandma died. He had been having random continuous nose bleeds this weekend and some tightness in his chest so when he finally vomited blood, my mom took him to the er. They said he had stroke level high blood pressure and an irregular heartbeat so they admitted him. They put the machines on him, his bp went down and they put some thing in his nose to stop the bleeding. He lied to the doc about going to see his cardiologist (he hasn't seen a doctor since his heart attack and stint surgery 4 years ago) but his tests came out ok so he went home last night.

After everything that has gone wrong this year and last, I spent that hour drive (yes, I was going hella fast but I was also coming from john wayne airport) crying and praying and thinking about what could happen next. There have been way too many moments like this for me and I just kept hoping it would be alright. This time, thankfully, it was.

It's been almost a year since Ben's stroke. I'm thinking I should spend that particular day (tomorrow) with him, since he's had his own share of tkos but once in the geniza bubble, there is no escape.

I feel like everything I've been posting is slightly traumatic and a downer, but everything happens for a reason and things still manage to work out for me, so the fight continues on.

I got plenty more rounds left in me... 

The Michael Jackson I will remember made music for the world to enjoy. His work has always been timeless and it's a legacy that will live on forever. He is the only artist that everyone in our family liked. We dedicated a whole Christmas program to him once and have incorporated his performances, music and dance moves so often over the years, I can't really remember all of them right now. And then later, we even had a Michael Jackson themed party at our house that people still regret missing.

He wasn't part of my family, but just knowing that again, another family out there is feeling the sorrow and despair that come with losing a loved one makes my heart ache. The difference is that since he touched so many people's lives, it almost feels like the whole world is in mourning.

And yeah, he wasn't perfect in life and maybe not even his death was entirely innocent, but you know what? Who cares?

I can't think of another artist who has spent 41 years in show business and still has the respect and love that Michael Jackson had.   

Ok, 2009, you've made your point. Life is short, precious and fleeting, live it to the fullest. This rollercoaster is too much for me, I'm ready for some carousel now...